On July 11, 2012, I was introduced to the love of my life, my son, Jesse. From the moment I felt his kicks, and followed the outline of his fingers glide against my tummy, I knew that my whole life was preparing me for this moment, for the one thing that truly made sense, becoming a mother. Neither class nor book could come close to expressing the kind of joy I would feel, indeed, the purest I have ever known.
Someone recently asked me what these last 7 months have been like; felt like? Where do I start? The answer would not be complete without my sharing the struggle and the pain that I endured on this journey. Needless to say, from the moment I found out the news of my pregnancy, I have treasured every single moment. It’s as if a piece of my heart broke off and formed another little heart in the shape of a small bundle who smiles, giggles, and looks at me adoringly. These last months have passed so quickly, but each day, each moment has left me with a sense of fulfillment that is quite honestly, indescribable. I am experiencing the overwhelming presence of love-the kind of love that not only nourishes my soul, but that teaches me how to give love in a way that is effortless, and knows no bounds.
However, the pink cloud can sometimes turn grey when it comes to the pervasive amount of chores that come with having a baby. My little bundle of joy comes with bundles of things to do. The monotony of the daily task list required to keep up with baby is, well, crazy-making at times, and can be relentless in its demand of my time, which should be spent catching up on sleep. However, sometimes during the tailspin I can stop, breath, and know that this too shall pass. Cleaning and sterilizing bottles no longer intimidate me, but the occasional diaper explosion can certainly compete with my “it’s all good” mentality. The truth is, some lessons are learned the messy way, like going to the mall without an extra outfit for baby, and that is precisely why I carry with me a small notebook that reminds me of things not to do again-and vice versa.
I have the pleasure to stay home with my child, and enjoy the wonders that he brings to my life every single day. Our days are simple yet exhilarating, filled with music and laughter. Sometimes I marvel in awe as I witness this precious little boy discover himself, and the world around him. Everyday I watch this miracle in my life grow a little bit more, and I too, grow along with him. I know now that the years of yearning were not a waste, but part of a journey that led me to the greatest calling of my life.