Here we are, once again, getting through another day. When will I ever have time to do the things I love? Making plans with a friend? Get to the gym or a simple walk? Life as we once knew it has radically shifted and the universe doesn’t revolve around you. So motherhood begins and now what?
Sleepless nights, changing diapers, crying baby. Sleep, eat, wake up and do it all again. When you think you can’t take another minute, your baby flashes a smile and right… it’s all worth it but it comes with a price. In fact you are the last to know your life has just become self-less. From here on in, you will always be needed. You are now someone’s mom! You’ll make mistakes and have feelings of inadequacies but guess what, you are not alone. It comes with the territory. There isn’t a generic parenting handbook or mommy for dummies. Every relationship has different dynamics and it’s impossible to expect definitive answers. One thing for sure is, your instincts will never lie. So listen carefully at what your insides are telling you.
Photo by: Liza Elliott-Ramirez
Love yourself first. Without putting on your oxygen mask first, you will run out of steam and not be able to help any member of your family, let alone yourself. Some of the greatest challenges in life is committing to what you’ve created, for better or for worse. I’ve often felt like a woman without an identity during the earlier years of raising my kids. You are often known as someone’s mom, who doesn’t even have a name. Well darn, I wish someone would have told me that I was about to lose my identity and be another mom amongst the herds of moms at the playground trying to figure things out themselves. It’s such an awkward feeling mingling with a bunch of odd moms out!
I’ve always been the type of woman who didn’t allow motherhood to cramp my style. I love to dance. I danced during my both of my pregnancies. I even had a maternity model booking on my due date! I scheduled my gym and dance appointments with myself. This time was non-negotiable.
Whether you have help or not, there are ways to maintain bits of who you once were, and still are. Don’t give up on those little independent things that make you happy. Don’t feel guilty, you deserve you. The fun, loving, sassy, YOU! It’s a choice that will take a commitment. Carving out time to have fun is a choice. We often lose sight of that. Make that appointment with yourself and keep it. Yes, you are going to feel tired so whenever you try to talk yourself out of taking a dance class or going to the gym, just realize that the battle is actually getting there. Once you’re there, It’s guaranteed fun. So get up, make your list of non-negotiable fun things that you need to feel happy and make a firm commitment to yourself. You deserve not to lose the parts of you that make others smile. You can be that fun woman! So let’s fight to preserve! Rock on Mom and don’t forget to fight for your Happy Mommy Box!